One in the same
by Xblacksheep18X
Summary: They will always so similar even though they came from different sides. But Snape hated him for all that he had. If secrets are revealed, can they become one? RL SS
1. Full moon

A\N This story will contain slash, since it's a Severus Snape\Remus Lupin paring. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE PAIRING OR YOU DON'T LIKE THIS TOPIC, JUST STOP READING NOW AND GO BACK. I haven't yet decided if its going to get graphic. So for right now, it will stay at the rating it is now, but it might change in future chapters.

This story is dedicated to one of my best friends, Brittany, for her birthday and since she introduced me on to the fabulous pairing of SS\RL

DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters or anything Harry Potter related

A low growl emerged from the clearing, piercing through the young man's heart

As the young man quickly turned around revealing the trees of the Forbidden Forest .He heard more loose branches snap under the hidden figures heavy footsteps as his heart started to race.

"Lumos" cried Severus Snape

Severus was just out for a stroll to his favorite thinking place. His mind was swirling around with this evenings event. Being hung from the astronomy tower from his shoelaces was not what he had in mind for that evening.

"That Damn Potter and his friends think they are so bloody special," " Think they can get away with that with no consequences, do they,"

But slowly, another thought came creeping into his head. A thought of a certain man that was always a follower like himself, just going along with what his peers said, so he doesn't get pointed out as a freak or the guy that gets malice wands pointed at him. Yet he always saw a glint of compassion from his eyes, a look that that just wanted to scream out and say stop when he was being tortured and harassed. He would call Remus Lupin, a friend, a word that he particularly loathed and people he didn't want to start making But Lupin always would, after this friends were gone, come up to him and try and comfort or at least help down, and for that Severus gave a pinch of this trust to the sandy blond boy.

"Well, well, well. What do we got here," a low raspy voice sneered

" Looks to me like, a very puny, cowardly boy…with very nice looking flesh," a pair of large, yellowish blood stained teeth appearing from the darkness

Severus couldn't not figure out if this thing was man or beast. He surely did not want to stick and find out, fearing if he didn't run soon, the figure would attack and maybe be clomping on his intestines like Yorkshire pudding. So he started to step ever so lightly towards the school but when the thing started to growl, he knew he wasn't going anywhere 

"Expelliarmus," Severus cried out hoping and praying that this thing had a wand, instead of "other means" to dispose of him and perhaps make him his late night snack

"Silly boy, I don't have a wand, and I sure be not needing one of them….with these," As the man made his entrance with hooded robes that looked a little too tight which were spattered with fresh blood and enormous pointy bloodstained teeth, as he smiled and walked towards Severus

Severus started walking backwards and soon found himself backed into a boulder with no place to go

"Now, boy, this surely wont hurt a bite….I mean bit," As the hood fell revealing a man with matted down grayish brown hair and piercing gray eyes.

The man's finger soon began to encircle Severus's neck, like a target that was just waiting to be hit

"Well, boy You walked into a dark place with no protection, unless you count that wand …but Im sure that wont do much good," as he took Snape's wand and snapped it in two.

"And I thought that old crack pots word's would surely set into your children's lovely flesh covered bodies," As he once again showed his teeth as he sneered at Snape

" And most important of all, You walked into this forest of mine, with a smell that was so intoxicating, with such a smell that any creature could mark its location, The smell of anger and shame," and with that it striked and sank into Severus's skin.

Causing such pain that not even words could describes, Causing new feeling of strength and the need for dominance , and the for flesh.

As Severus Snape suddenly rose from his bed, remembering the night that changed his life forever.. 


	2. Sitting, Dreaming,Despising

Ok...sorry for the long update...even though i got no reviews...but thats ok...Anyway to make everything clear...Fernir Greyback was the one that bit Sevurus not Remus. ok well on to the second chapter of the story.

The vast pitch black sky was set over Spinner's End as one man was awoken. Severus Snape paced in his den from one dark corner to the other with only the candlelight to reflect his face which was covered with scratches and worry lines, that made the potions teacher much older and even possibly evilier than he ever should be. There was no doubt that Severus was portrayed as a man that he wasnt. He was a truely misunderstood man that was angered at society for never accepting him...ever

"Not even before that thing bit me," Severus pondered to himself Everybody knew that as a teenager, Snape was pale, lanky, and had greasy lank black hair. He was quiet for the fact that his abusive father taught him that leaning on someone made him weak and always had a particlur interest in Defense Againest the Dark Arts, which made many think that he was up to know good. He was usually always harrassed by the Mauderers, which as bad as the insulting and spells casted went. He always found it amusing. As much as he despised them, he found them to be good equals.

Yet even equals went to far, that clear full moon night of April, when he got hung by his shoelaces from the Astromony tower. He was already in a bad mood when he ran into Potter, Black,Lupin, and Wormtail, so he just walked right past them hitting into Potter's shoulder, WIth his big head to go with that big ego of his, Potter thought that he needed to be taught a lesson of respect. So he was hoisted by Liberacorpus to where he stayed for a couple hours before someone annonymously reported to Dumbledore that he was hanging there. Yet not before the student just came out to gaze upon the brillant trick that the Mauderers pulled on greasy haired Snivellus.And from there his night just got worse.

He was bitten by Fenrir Greyback, the notrious werewolf that liked to bite children even when he wasnt transformed. He later found this all out when he became Voldemort's most trusted man and Greyback was sprawled out on the dungeon pleeing for his life and apoglizing as every Crucio spell hit him.Yet this didnt make Severus satsified. No amount of torture and pleads could give his back his life, his sorry yet normal pathetic excuse for a life. 

Sorry for this chapter being so short...i justed wanted to update something before i lost the story track in my mind...so anyway i promise that i will update next chapter a lot sooner So review... 


	3. Compassion for the loniest man

ello...i realized i havent updated in a while...sorry for that -;;..anyway I FINALLY got a review..hopefully theres more to come...anyway heres the 3rd chapter to One in the same. Also this story will take place in the summer before harry's third year and probably into PoA

Snapes thought then drifted to a certain man had the same "hairy problem" as he did. He thought of the only man that showed him true compassion not that bloody kind that was only shown because they truely pitied the sullen man. Remus Lupin, probably was the only person that Snape could call a friend, yet god its been so long since he saw the kind hearted yet also misunderstood sandy haired man.  
Severus always wondered how Remus could be so kind to the world when the world couldnt repay that kindness since he was a werewolf. He didnt know how Remus could still contribute to the wizarding world, trying to release it from the stone cold grip of Lord Voldemort, when the most of the wizarding world couldnt even imagine a werewolf in their society, in fear that he will taint the already very much tainted.

He looked down to his left forearm where the dark mark stood. It was very light yet you could see the outline. Severus did all that he could to get rid of that mark, even though he very well knew that it wouldnt come clean until the dark lord was defeated.Yet Severus wanted to get rid of that life, wanted to the free man who could walk down the street with no cares in the world...well at least none that involve Voldemort finding out that he lived as a double spy, the most dangerous role in this most dangerous war.

He knew that he never could shed his life because there just was just too many layers. No matter how many lies he untold or how many persona he shook off. He was stuck in this life because of the stories that he had to live up to and the opinions, whether true or not, had to be said. So his life could be spared to the pain he would of recieved if he was found out to be a traitor.

Severus Snape knew that he could trust no one yet how he longed just to be able to let his guard down and just as him...not as the death eater, not as the hard faced potions teacher that had something stuck up his arse permentantly, and certainly not as the freak that he had no control of. He just wanted to be Severus Snape for once.

once again...i know these chapters keep getting shorter and im sorry. I will update the next chapter a lot faster. 


	4. Run ins and breakdowns

WooT...two chapters in two days ..that must be a record..hehe.I wanna thank AdmiralJackal and Serpent 91( again) for reviewing. I means a lot to me! anyway i bring you the 4th chapter of one in the same.

Disclaimer: i dont own anything Harry Potter related...sadly

The sun just started to shine in through Snape's mothed bitten curtains as Severus awoken from his peaceful thought. Term was about to start and he needed to get supplies down in Knockturn Alley. How much he wouldnt give to just crawl under a hole and die then teach potions, one of the most brillant subjects of witchery, to a group of students with no potential to be even close to master it or even appreciate it.

So after he got dressed and had his morning black coffee, he apparated right in front of Borkin & Burkes. Yet instead of landing with his feet on the ground. He fell to the floor producing a loud thump. Only after a second after realizing that he did in fact land were he was susposed to, he realized that landed on someone, a very warm and soft somone.

"Severus,would you kindly get off me," spoke Remus Lupin.

Severus' heart jumped when he realized who he landed on, yet then realized that these feelings would soon have to die and then "Snivellus" Sanpe would have to come out once more.

"Well, possibly Lupin, you shouldnt be standing where i was about to land. In fact why would a person like you be down a place like this,"Snape stated with that casual malice in this voice. Yet in his head he wished he could take it all back. 

"Hmmmm...still as bitter as ever Severus, i see.""Im down here because i need to pick up some things for term," as Remus was cut off

"Wait. you cant mean that Dumbledore has given you the position to Defense againest Dark arts...Thats impossible," Snape in disbelief.

"yes, thats right, Albus has given me the job...a job that i believe you have been after for a long time," Remus still said calmly "Well, i guess yet again the job will be vacant in less than a year. Its a pity though, other than me, you probably are the best qualified," Snape stated.

"Thank you, Severus, i guess ill take that as a compliment. Now if you excuse me, i have to get to my errands. It's was nice to see you again, Severus," as Remus smiled and started to walk away.

"Likewise, Remus,Likewise," as Snape smirked and contiuned to go on his way.

What both men didnt see was that both men looked back at each other when the other's back was turned , not certain what this meeting meant, yet they knew it was a beginning of something good.

Severus brought the materials that he need and apparated home. All while thinking of a certain werewolf. Snape forget how how blue Remus's eye were, like he could just fall into them and he forget how his hair ,even though gray, was a nice color of sandy brown. How he would just love to reach up and touch it even pull it. Even Remus's lips were so inviting.

Severus quickly realized that his fantasties would lead to no good and slapped himself thinking about it yet his werewolf instincts wouldnt let him. That side of him very much realized that he found a mate. He pondered why his werewolf side was coming out, since Severus tried so hard to keep to tame until that time of the month. Then he soon found out why. His thoughts left him to the calender. It soon would be the full moon.

Soon Severus would have to transform into the beast that just couldnt wait to get out.

Well this chapter is indeed longer. Next time Severus and Remus both transform into Werewolves and they meet up.Will there be puppy love in the air..Stay tuned. 


	5. Running with new freedom

When the full moon finally rose, Severus Snape was shut up in the basement of his home. Just waiting for the transformation to begin so it can finally be over. His basement itsself was very shabby with plain whitewashed walls that now are dulled and very much beaten up. On the wall though was the words, That doesnt not kill me makes me stronger, scratched in with what looked like dryed blood. Severus didnt not infact know how those words came upon his walls, all he knew is that they keep him struggling not to kill himself.

Soon the moonlight filled the musty room and became reflected in Snapes' black eyes. The transformation began.Pain began to surge through his body. His knees buckled and fell on the floor. His eyes grew dilated and his hands grew into the claws. Fur began to cover his body as his clothes were ripped off. A piercing howl was let out as the beast was released.

The werewolf began to pace around the room wanting to be fed. He started to scratch at the doors and walls. Needing flesh and wanting a new sensation that he never felt before. The need for a mate. The need to be loved and for somone that he can just run free with.

All of the sudden a raspy howl came out of nowhere. It was a call of distress. It needed help and Severus would be damned if he didnt help it. Compassion filled the furry body as alderirine pulsed through his brain. All the werewolfs built up strength was soon to be let out.

His paws crushed through the pliable wood and he started to bolt towards the distressed creature that was just begging to be saved. He came into a field that was connected to think dark woods. Severus had to admit the dirt and cool grass was a nice change under his paws instead of cold hard floors. It made him feel alive. He let out a loud howl, letting the other werewolf now that he was coming and just one for being alive and this unknown freedon that he was glad he had.

He soon had come to a clearing and the pungent stench of blood had hit him with such a shock that he increased his pace with such velocity.He realized that combined with the blood was the scent that he was quite familar with. He hoped to anything that it wasnt who he knew it was.

He was getting real close, the overwhelming scent of blood was definetly getting to him. Severus only hoped that he got to Remus before anything else did or could. Fresh blood was very rare in these forests and the creatures that inhabited them took every oppurtunity they could get to sink their teeth into something fresh. If he didnt get to Remus soon, there wouldnt be much left of Remus to save.

Snape stopped suddenly because he could see something's outline on the ground 5 feet ahead of him. Its breathing was staggard and its blood was shining in the moonlight, It did not look good for Remus, yet still Severus could not let him die.

He approached Remus slowly letting him feel his non harmful presence so he wouldnt get frightened of the the approaching beast.Remus realized who it was, who ever it was, was no harm to him.and became less ridged. Severus had no idea how to help the wounded werewolf but started to lick the wound with his toungue. His blood was warm and unseemingly tasty. The bleeding wasnt stopping so he laided himself tightly next to Remus hoping he could work as a human bandage or a wolf bandage for that matter.

The blood flow soon stopped and he could hear Remus's heart beat slowly increasing. His eyes became livid and his strength came back to him. Severus could feel his muscles twitch and how he tried to stand up. Severus let out a low growl indicating that he in no condition to get up just yet. Both were startled at the sudden domianace yet neither of them compalined. Both of them very much liked it.

So they rested just enjoying each others body heat and conpany. An half hour turned to one hour and an hour turned to two hours as Snapes' muzzle was protectively over Remus's and his body encirlced Remus's smaller one.

They both woke up to the brustling in the surrounding trees and knew they had to separate. So with the help of Severus's body as support, Remus's weaker body was helped up. They began to run together side by side. Snapes mind was filled thought of acceptance and realizing that he had found a mate. Someone that he could run free with. Someone that he could let out all the bottled feeling too. Remus could sense this all and moved in closer to the dominant wolf.

They had to part their ways now. The moon was setting . The sky was getting lighter. The werewolfs looked into eachs others eyes one last time and they were off. They both looked back seeing that all along they were all they each other ever needed. 


	6. Fire and Ice

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Severus woke up in the basement once again. His body was covered in blood as his memory was dazed. He felt so hungry though so he knew he did not eat whosever

blood was on his naked body. The whole clothes's ripping off was quite annoying especially if you did not wake up where you started at .His memory drift to the summer after he was bitten and him waken up in the display case of the local butcher. It was a good thing he woke up and got out of there before anybody else got to see a naked young man surrounded by half eaten salami and hot dog chains wrapped around himself.

He got up yet his knees soon buckled once more. Flashes of memories swarmed his brain as he let out a painful yell. He remembered himself transformed and running. He remembered the feeling of dirt under his paws. Then he saw a wounded werewolf on the forest floor in pain and then everything went blank. Yet he knew who it was on that floor yelping in pain. It was Remus. He could still smell his scent on himself.

His dominating instincts needed to know if his mate was all right. Yet the werewolf was piece of mind was gone and logic and instinct had once again taken over. He knew rushing to Remus's aid would show him as weak and would possibly expose that he was a werewolf yet Severus could not imagine how moronic that most of the order, probably who was taking care of his Remus, would have to be if they did not know his little secret. Hogwarts Grounds was not that big to hide two werewolves that needed to transform into two deadly being once a month that would kill even his best friends.

His mind just jumped at the thought that he called Remus his. It was a nice feeling that he could finally take care of something without it being destroyed at the hands of his

abusive father. Yet the question was if Remus would allow this sudden dominance over him. If he would just allow Severus to take his hands around the worn, aged but soft, Severus imagined, face, kiss those welcoming lips and just let him stare in to his eyes and take all those hiding pains away. Severus knew he had to get him as fast as he could. Yet

he knew the time was not right. He knew if he did not know that much of the previous nights events, if and what would Remus remember

He decided that the best actions were to rebuild the basement's wall that would not take very long or at least two flicks of his wand. Then he will sleep and would regroup his thoughts on how the best way to come across the situation. Then at night, he will once again transform and venture out to find his mate. His wolf instincts completely ignored these reasonable tasks as they took over more of his body. It was like fire and ice battling each other in the same body. Severus, cold, distant, and rational fighting against his werewolf self, loving, impatient, and stubborn against anything that does not leave him with his mate. Both cant survive with the other there even both compliment each other in a very deadly way. Turmoil began as Severus tossed himself to sleep.

Severus' dreamland was the one safe place that he knew he belonged. No angry people pointing even angrier wands. No menacing students creating fake images of him that

make him out to be even more of a stone cold asshole. His dreams were filled with people that once loved him like his caring and sweet mother and places where he could not be hurt again . Yet he knew that his dreams were his weakness and unlike other fools he knew that they were only dreams. No more, no less.

His dreams were filled with the previous nights event currently playing in his mind like a movie. There grew a smile on his face realizing that even long after he had to wake and get along with his life that his dream like movie would not be a part of his dreamland. That it was real and someone out in the real world reached out to him and showed him affection. His dreams soon drifted to Remus lying so helplessly on a double poster bed. Severus's hand appeared to reach out and touch the other man's head. He was burning up. This sent chills up Snape's spine. He just felt so warm, so appealing, yet so distressed and needy. He lay on the bed, next to Remus, almost touching him just so he could absorb Remus's radiating body heat. He just lay there, just enjoying the sleeping man's company. At last, he got up and gently kissed his forehead as a barrier of protecting and then Severus startlingly woke.

At first, he really questioned if that dream was not just a dazed part of his reality yet the empty bed space answered all those questions. He just could not believe it was a dream. He could still feel the heat that Remus generated off; he could still feel the soft skin under his lips. It just seemed too real to be a dream. Yet maybe it did not always have to be a dream, Severus thought. Maybe for once this all could spill over into reality.

Soon the sun faded and the moon was about to rise and Severus was just taking a night's stroll. He knew that it would be pointless to pen himself up inside the house because he would do whatever it took to break free and run towards his mate and the freedom that he just couldn't get enough of. The moon finally rose and the transformation commenced. This time though it was a lot smoother as Severus voluntarily let the werewolf inside of him out. There wasn't much pain and the screeching howls seemed just scars of the past. The wolf was entirely released, and not just because of the monthly transformation but also of all the pressure of just being a complex human with a spinning mind was gone. The guilt was lifted off his shoulder as the lies were just melted away with the warmth of the moon. He knew this is what it meant to be alive. To have feelings that could be shown and not bottled inside of him. To have someone to care about and not to just sit on the sidelines and watch their important relationship just decay.

He howled hoping that Remus would hear him and hopefully rush to his side. He just hoped he was alive. The pain alone of knowing what loved felt like and not to experience it would be murder. It would be enough to suppress his inner beast forever. Just in a nick of time, he heard a familiar howl that was approaching in a fast pace.

He rushed in the direction of the howl and soon came to a clearing. Severus's heartbeat began to race as Remus came over a hill. Remus was limping yet still could jog in great speeds. Both flew to each other and when they finally connected they circled each other as Severus protectively put his head overlapping Remus's in sort of an animal hug. Remus after a while broke this hug and started licking Severus's forehead playfully. The two fell to the ground and started wrestling. It become intense until Remus pinned Severus. Severus did not approve so he nipped Remus's left ear as Remus then took off, as Severus very close behind him. Remus being still a bit weak began to wobble as he was running so Severus moved closer letting his mate push against him so he wouldn't topple down. They ran through the moon light forests until it was almost time to leave each other again. Neither of them could part their ways. It was just too hard and too soon for a goodbye that would have to be enough for a month. All they could do was stare in each other's eyes and come to the conclusion that they both belonged to each other now and whether they were in human or wolf form, nothing could keep them apart. So they raced back to the spot nearest of where they met and settled down next to one another. They let their heartbeats drop and soon two beats combined into one. Both their hearts and heartbeat were in sync as nothing now could tear them apart.

The Sun began to rise as Severus and Remus awoke to each other. Severus was cradling Remus's body as Remus's hand was protectively held over Severus's. Severus couldn't help and look down at the handsome man before him and thank Merlin that he had just found love. He kissed Remus's forehead before standing up himself and then helping Lupin up.

Snape's arm found his way down to Remus's waist, sitting there loosely yet protectively as they walked back to Spinner's end not worrying about the trials and very little acceptance that they will soon face. Instead they just focus on each other's company and how good it felt just to let their guard down for once.

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Ok...here is the 6th chapter...again i wanna thank AdmiralJackal and Serpent 91 for reviewing to every new chapter I update. So this ones for you guy...i just hope i didnt disapoint you


	7. All is not fair in love and war

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Remus sat on Severus's bed as he watched his lover pace back and forth. He was quite amused with that cute sneer on Severus's face that he always seemed to make when he was thinking.

"Think of digging a hole to china or do you just happen to like worn down floorboards," Remus said with a hint of laughter in his voice.

"Well, at least, you can have a sense of humor in a time like this," Severus snarled

"A time like what," as Remus moved across the room to open the curtains," It's a beautiful morning and I don't know about you but I have never been happier right now in years,"

Severus realized this mistake as he saw the frown dawn on his lover's face. He was happy, very happy, in fact. A weight was just lifted of his shoulder just by looking at Remus's face and just by feeling his loving presence in the room made him feel alive

"There is no words that can explain how I'm feeling, love," as he snaked his arms around Remus's torso as he placed a cool kiss on his neck.

"Well, then. I suggest you show me then because I fear I'm very confused about this all," Remus said playfully

" Gladly" as Severus pushed Remus on his bed and began to climb on top of him. Kissing his lips in a passionate heat that it didn't take long for it to become more intimate. Remus gladly let Severus's tongue in when he started biting his bottom lip, forcefully asking for entrance. Soon their tongues became battling for dominance as Remus's hands began to unbutton Severus's shirt. They broke apart as Remus started biting Snape's neck and starting kissing down his neck on to his torso and started sucking on his nipples. Soon Severus could feel the hardness forming in Lupin's pants and thought it was time to release it. Snape started to unbutton Remus's trouser as a knock on the door interrupted the two lovers

Severus started dressing as Remus made a request that he not go get the door. Severus just gave him a look that explained it all. A look that told him that the world was not ready for them. That it would be suicidal if anybody found out about them. Remus looked down, as he now knew what caused the pacing and the sour face: His lover's need for acceptance.

Severus opened the door as Lucius Malfoy let himself in and went to Severus's bar pouring himself a Merlow and dropped himself down on Severus's ratty couch like the king he thought he was.

Severus attempted to end the silence. " Lucius, how _wonderful_ it is to see you."

"Cut the crap, Snape, you know we'd both rather not have to deal with each other…if not necessary," in his rather cold manner.

" Then, why are you here and not torturing your wife or that good for nothing son or perhaps the random muggle that gives you a weird look," Severus stated.

" How much pleasure I would be having if I could be doing that instead of being here, _with you,_ Lucius said.

"Then, what do you want, what are the Dark Lord' wishes, or is this just a visit so you can sharpen your threatening skills," Snape sneered

"He wished to take down some of the order. He feels that if he knocks out some key players, they might as well surrender," Lucius said with contempt.

"Who and why are you telling me this"

"Well, the lord thought that you deserved a reward for being one of his loyal servants might like to take down some people that made your life so difficult," He thought you might like to some people's tortured faces before you finish them off," Lucius stated

"Who might this be," Severus's voice rose with curiosity

Malfoy put down his glass, got up, and grabbed for his cane. As he started for the door, almost passing Severus, but then took a couple steps back and he whispered in his ear.

"The rest of the marauders, of course," As Lucius swiftly took his leave leaving a shaken Severus to stop in his place, jaw dropped, and his mind racing.

Severus fell as all weight was dropped on his shoulders once again. His knees buckled and he fell on the ground and started crying. His happiness was soon to be killed, leaving himself back where he always started. Alone. Yet it was so much worse, this time. He was left exposed showing his underbelly to the world. He rocked back and forth just thinking about all the times that the world screwed him over and how everything that he eventually learned to love was just taken right before his eyes.

Remus came running in, as the sobs grew harder. He fell to the ground in front of the broken man. He tried to stop the rocking as he enveloped Severus in a hug, just letting him cry on his shoulder. Letting the numbness wear off and letting the heat all come back to him.

After a half hour, Severus was quiet, his sobbing stopped and his body was limp. Remus thought this was a good time to figure what happened.

"Sev, what's wrong." who was at the door," Remus said as he rubbed Severus's back.

Severus eyes came livid again as he pushed himself off Remus and into a corner. This made Remus very curious wondering what game Severus was trying to play. Yet he knew one thing, He was very good at games and would win every round that they played.

Remus advanced to Severus's body and started to caress his cheek. Severus just twitched and recoiled even farther from the man. Remus knew something was up. He saw the coldness come back to Severus's eyes. He knew something was up and it wasn't good. No it wasn't good at all.

Severus finally spoke "You need to get out of here," the malice once again showing its ugly face.

Remus was taken back by the time that once again resurfaced. "Not until you tell me what's wrong,"

" I believe this is my house and you are no longer welcome in it," Snape in a very quiet tone.

Remus had had it. He pushed Severus's lank body against a wall and just stared into his eyes. He was not going to let someone that was good for both just slip through the cracks He just stood there, waiting for either of them to make the first move.

Severus just stood in disbelief; nobody had put up this much struggle to keep him there. Never had he known someone that would do whatever it took them to keep a friendship. He was taken back by the fierceness and stubbornness in Remus's eyes. He was intrigued by Remus's smell of perseverance. His knees became weak as he fell on his mate as Remus caught him in a hug.

Severus motioned for the couch, where Remus followed and sat right beside him. Severus gulped and started telling Remus of the danger he was in and no matter no much that they loved each other. He couldn't bear to see Remus in an ounce of pain, even if that meant him losing someone that he loved. He told Remus that he must go into hiding and he must forget about him. Its was either that or Severus would kill himself before he had to kill him

Remus sat their speechless for a while. Severus knew what was to happen next and he just couldn't bear to watch him walk out that door. He knew that this relationship was too good to be true. He knew that always someone would save his or her life instead of his. He knew he wasn't important enough. He had to go and hide so Remus would not see his tears. He wouldn't let him see his under belly. He couldn't let him see that it affected him that much.

He started to stand yet a gentle hand pushed him back down. He started to stare at the man who stopped him. Before he could respond, Warm lips soon crushed his own, Saying all that ever needed to be said.

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Hoped you enjoyed it and hope the time i updated wasnt that long. So review...either compliments or critisim will be fine. 


	8. Help not wanted and views of another

**disclaimer- i own nothing**

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Silence. That was all that was heard through out Severus's Snape house. Yet it was not the normal silence where there was no one around but his guilt, anger, and worry about the world and where he stood in it. This time he had someone. The problem was how to keep that person here with him. Unlike all of the others who just picked up and left when it got to tough and the sobs got too intense. No, this time was different. There was no choice in the matter here. _He_ had to stay there, for both their sakes. It was a matter of life or death

Severus looked over at his lover's sleeping body. He watched him sleep peaceful. Watching him inhaling and exhaling without a care in the world or without the struggle they were about to endure. He liked that Remus could feel that way for once. He wished that he could protect him so he never would have to feel anything else. Yet Remus was too determined to not let Severus fight his battle alone. He knew that he would not just sit there idly by and watch him struggle for both of their lives. He was there for whatever happened to them.

Severus started to pace back and forth. It was a nervous habit that he couldn't shake loose. He thought of the day's events .He thought of the tasks that lie ahead and consequences that soon would come after. Shall he once again cower to the floor, tail between his legs and kiss the Darks lord's feet and kill the only person that could truly make him stand up to his toughest fears? Or shall he run away, hiding for the rest of his days, and let the perceptions of him by others just fill the shadows of where he once stood. Ah, the irony. It was a choice between shaking the untruthful layers that surround him or just let them close around him while he quietly slip away in the darkness. Being a coward, something he promised himself he will never be. Both mean life or death. There is no other solution. No other compromise.

Yet it is not just his life that he will have to worry about anymore. Loving each other means that there is now a large target on each of their backs. He knew one thing: They would not let the love between them die. If this meant running or fighting, there was no turning back now.

Severus knew that all this couldn't just be dumped on his and Remus's shoulders. They would need help and advice. They needed that knew close to all. Severus could even bet that he knew that they were together. He was off to see Dumbledore. After kissing Remus's forehead, He a**pparated to Hogsmeade.**

**He reached The Three Broomsticks smoothly and before he could get to the door. A wise but caring voice spoke out behind him**

**"Ah, Severus, my boy, I was wondering when I would see you," Dumbledore said in his usual all knowing voice. **

**Of course, the old man knew. He was all knowing in ways that even the wisest became puzzled. Yet many did not ask how Albus Dumbledore knew what he knew. It was one of the many unexplainable mysteries that would stay unsolved.**

**"Headmaster, sir, I was just about to come and fund you, but I guess you already knew that," Severus said**

**"Ah, yes, I did have a strange feeling I would be seeing you yet I thought for sure that Remus would be joining us," Dumbledore said questioning **

**"No, it's just me but as you also know, we are in need of your assistance." Dumbledore just nodded and began to speak when Severus continued**

**"Yet I also needed to tell you that the Dark Lord has new orders for me and I'm afraid that will not fulfill them," Severus said while looking down**

**He began to tell Dumbledore the previous day events about the full moon, his and Remus's newly found love, and finally Lucius's sudden drop in. **

**"He...he….I mean…the Dark lord wants me to kill," Severus begins to tear up and just bows his head. His hair blocks the whole sight, but everybody that was paying attention could feel his pain.**

**"Severus, you need not say more, for once your emotions say it all." Dumbledore said as he continued." " The order will protect Remus, though he must go into hiding." **

**"NO…I thought you of all people would understand …YOU are saying that he must be protected FROM me…that he must be hidden FROM me….we decided that nothing would destroy our love," Severus said defensively.**

**"There is no other way, I'm sorry, but this must happen, for both of your sakes." " It has to seem that you two have no relations so Lord Voldemort must not get suspicious"" Yet you will still be able to see Remus…. I promise," Dumbledore trying to clam down Severus**

**"I promised Remus that we would never leave each others side. I promised that the Dark Lord would never destroy our love. AND I promised that I would never run away with my tail between my legs. I will take a stand, with or without your help. I'm not going to sit there and watch the only person that truly cares about me die. **

"Very well, I will alert the order of this news and start training for the upon coming battle." "I pray that your love resist the many struggles for this battle will be long," as with this Dumbledore was at the door.

"And Severus, Remus is not the only one that truly cares so don't make that mistake and push away those who try and help." Dumbledore said wisely as the door shut leaving Severus sitting, tears rolling down his once emotionless face.

Remus woke to cold silent room from his peaceful rest. He guessed that Severus was out. So much as happened in the last few days, he wasn't been able to just think. It's been such a blur that he himself doesn't really know what's happening. It's all so surreal

He loved Severus, even before that night. He loved him when he was just that rejected boy that was terrorized by his group of friends. He could never understand why James and Sirius made fun of him the major part of their schooling at Hogwarts. He only could guess that Severus threatened his two best friends. They knew he was strong and probably smarter than both of them. Or maybe they saw the aura around him that just said Stay back or feel my wrath, like he often did. They knew he had to be taken down a peg so he didn't threaten their post. Remus just couldn't stand him being terrorized so as un-marauder as it was, he also made it a point, to help him down or give some kind of kind gesture. He needed to show that the Marauder, the most popular group of Hogwarts, weren't a just evil monarch, that they had a kind side to them too.

Through the 5th, 6th, and 7th years of Hogwarts, Remus could feel that him and Severus were growing closer. No, it wasn't like a simple hello, or a few words when passing in the hallway. He felt like they were growing closer internal. Like they were closer in their day-to-day struggles. Like they were just followers, following friends or just following the schools population just trying to fit, so their problems wouldn't be revealed and malice wands soon be pointed at them. It was like they were one in the same. Yet only Remus was lucky enough to be protected and got to live in peace with the exception of his "furry problem"

He always just wanted to cup Severus's pale soft cheek, look into Severus pretty black eyes, and tell him that it was going to be ok. He wanted to tell the world just to stay away from the misunderstood boy. He wanted only to protect him. Yet this was the real world. They came from two different houses; both know to hate each other. No love or even friendship could blossom from underneath the stone grip of hatred between the houses.

He couldn't get to him either after Graduation simply cause nobody could seem to located him. Or they knew was he was gone. He was a Death eater. Remus knew that all hope was lost here. There was no way that he could get to him. For the Light cannot

Penetrate the dark. All he could do was wait and hope that all hope wasn't lost. He still thought Severus was not totally gone until the night of 0ctober 31 1981, the night where his best friends, James and Lily Potter, were murdered and their one year old son Harry Potter, began the boy who lived. Remus was heartbroken of the deaths and all hope was destroyed for the misunderstood man's innocent. He wasn't mad enough to threaten to make Severus pay; he just disregarded him even though the tugs of his heart wouldn't let him. He realized that it was his life and even crept across the thought that his friends pushed him into this path of darkness. He shuddered at the thought.

As Severus and him lives took completely different turns, the connections of being one in the same still stood. Even though they never corresponded with each other, for that owl would be very awkward. How would it start? Dear Severus, I wish for you not to be a death eater because I love you and I am sorry if my friends pushed you to the dark side. That would not work. They once again were different side. They couldn't love each other or even have a friendship. Even when Severus became a double spy, it was much too difficult.

So until that fateful day in Knockturn alley, any thoughts of Severus Snape was pushed so far back of Remus Lupin's mind. All of those dreadful night that he woke up screaming Snape's name, all those lustful dreams that would send him to hell if anybody could read his mind. All those thoughts came falling back to him. Yet now he could sense there was something behind those sarcastic words. There was almost a longing mixed up in his tone.

Until that night of the full moon, Remus never understood Severus even though he sure did try. He never saw the glances across the Great halls, the smiles when his back was turn, or those hurtful comments were not meant to wench his heart but to calm it with the kindness underneath. He was blind to the love that was there all along to that night.

"Ohhhhh…that night," Remus groaned the thought of that night. He never knew being a werewolf could bring so much happiness. He never expected that yearning for something could make the transformation so much smoother. It didn't even matter anymore; he wouldn't be alone yet he never really was. He had the best friends that anybody could of asked for. Yet now with just one transformation, he feels so much freer. Plus this curse turned into a treasure. He has found a mate. Someone that would protect him and who he could protect, he loved that feeling

Most of all he loved how he had finally found his true love. For once, he got what he wanted. He was never going to let go of Severus. It was a life or death matter. They were each other's and nothing was going to change that. He would fight Earth, wind, and fire for him. He was not a love person but once he loved someone, he would fight to the die defending him or her. He was very loyal and he meant business. Especially in this case, he has never felt more love for someone.

Just then the front door opened, as Severus walked in downtrodden. Remus heard him collapse on the couch. He ran in to see his head down and his hands just hiding his face.

Remus ran to him, straddled him, cupped his chin and gave Severus a kiss of 10 or more year of pent up passion

Severus could feel that kiss down to his toes

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well i finally updated. hope it wasnttoo long. anyway enjoy...and review please.

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